eKhtiyaar hota-amir minaaii

For word meanings and explanatory discussion in English click on the tabs marked “Roman” or “Notes”.

اختیار ہوتا ۔ امیر احمد امیدؔ مینائی

۱

مرے بس میں یا تو یارب وہ سِتم شعار ہوتا

یہ نہ تھا تو کاش دل پر مجھے اختیار ہوتا

۲

پسِ مرگ کاش یوں ہی مجھے وصلِ یار ہوتا

وہ سرِ مزار ہوتا میں تہہ مزار ہوتا

۳

ترا مے کدہ سلامت ترے خُم کی خیر ساقی

مرا نشہ کیوں اُترتا مجھے کیوں خُمار ہوتا

۴

میں ہوں نامراد ایسا کہ بِلک کے یاس روتی

کہیں پا کے آسرا کچھ جو امیدوار ہوتا

۵

نہیں پوچھتا ہے مجھ کو کوئی پھول اس چمن میں

دلِ داغدار ہوتا تو گلے کا ہار ہوتا

۶

وہ مزا دیا تڑپ نے کہ یہ آرزو ہے یارب

مرے دونوں پہلوؤں میں دلِ بے قرار ہوتا

۷

دم نزع بھی جو وہ بت مجھے آ کے منہ دکھاتا

تو خدا کے منہ سے اتنا نہ میں شرمسار ہوتا

۸

نہ ملک سوال کرتے نہ لحد فشار دیتی

سر راہ کوئے قاتل جو مرا مزار ہوتا

۹

جو نگاہ کی تھی ظالم تو پھر آنکھ کیوں چرائی

وہی تیر کیوں نہ مارا جو جگر کے پار ہوتا

۱۰

میں زباں سے تم کو سچا کہو لاکھ بار کہہ دوں

اسے کیا کروں کہ دل کو نہیں اعتبار ہوتا

۱۱

مری خاک بھی لحد میں نہ رہی امیرؔ باقی

انہیں مرنے ہی کا اب تک نہیں اعتبار ہوتا

एख़्तियार होता – अमीर अहमद अमीर मीनाई

मेरे बस में या तो या-रब वो सितम-शे’आर होता

ये न था तो काश दिल पर मुझे एख़्तियार होता

पस-ए मर्ग काश यूँ ही मुझे वस्ल-ए यार होता

वो सर-ए मज़ार होता मैं तह-ए मज़ार होता

तेरा मय-कदा सलामत तेरे ख़ुम की ख़ैर साक़ी

मेरा नश्शा क्यूँ उतरता मुझे क्यूँ ख़ुमार होता

मैं हूँ ना-मुराद ऐसा के बिलक के यास रोती

कहीं पा के आस्रा कुछ जो उमीद-वार होता

नहीं पूछता है मुझ को कोई फूल इस चमन में

दिल-ए दाग़-दार होता तो गले का हार होता

वो मज़ा दिया तड़प ने के ये आर्ज़ू है या-रब

मेरे दोनों पहलुऔं में दिल-ए बे-क़रार होता

दम-ए नज़’अ भी जो वो बुत मुझे आ के मुँह दिखाता

तो ख़ुदा के मुँह से इतना न मैं शर्मसार होता

न मलक सवाल करते न लहद फ़िशार देती

सर-ए राह-ए कू-ए क़ातिल जो मेरा मज़ार होता

जो निगाह की थी ज़ालिम तो फिर आँख क्यूँ चुराई

वही तीर क्यूँ न मारा जो जिगर के पार होता

१०

मैं ज़बाँ से तुम को सच्चा कहो लाख बार कह दूँ

इसे क्या करूँ कि दिल को नहीं ए’तिबार होता

११

मेरी ख़ाक भी लहद में न रही अमीर बाक़ी

उन्हें मरने ही का अब तक नहीं ए’तबार होता

 

Click here for background and on any passage for word meanings and explanatory discussion. amir ahmed amir minaaii (1829-1900) was contemporary of daaGh dehlavi and much like him received patronage in rampur and later in hyderabad, where he died and is buried. Both he and daaGh composed Ghazals in the zamin of Ghalib.
1
mere bas1 meN ya2 to yaa-rab3 vo sitam-she’aar4 hota
ye na thaa to kaash5 dil par mujhe eKhtiyaar6 hota    
1.control, influence 2.either 3.god, lord 4.of cruel nature, hard hearted 5.I wish 6.control, dominion
O, god, either the hard hearted beloved should have been under my influence, or if this could not have been then I wish I had control over my own heart.

2
pas1-e marg2 kaash3 yuN hi mujhe vasl4-e yaar5 hota
vo sar6-e mazaar7 hota maiN tah8-e mazaar7 hota    
1.behind, after 2.death 3.I wish 4.union 5.beloved 6.in front of, at the head of 7.grave, tomb 8.under
The shaa’er/lover has pined for union all his life. That never happened during his life and now it seems it did not even happen upon his death because he is wishing wistfully that after death, I wish that at least I could have achieved union with the beloved like this … that she had been in front of the grave and I under it. The implication of this wistful wishing is that even that did not happen.

3
tera mai-kada1 salaamat2 tere Khum3 ki Khair4 saaqi
mera nashsha5 kyuN utarta mujhe kyuN Khumaar6 hota    
1.tavern 2.long live 3.barrell, flask 4.well being, prosper 5.intoxication 6.hangover
May your tavern live long, O saaqi, and may your wine barrells always be full. If this were to happen, why would I ever lose my intoxication (become sober) or get a hangover. The implication is that if he keeps on drinking, he will never get a hangover, will always be intoxicated.

4
maiN huN na-muraad1 aisa ke bilak2 ke yaas3 roti
kahiN paa ke aasra4 kuchh jo umid-vaar5 hota    
1.unfortunate 2.sobbing 3.yearning 4.shelter, support, encouragement 5.hopeful
The shaa’er/over never gets any encouragement from the beloved. If he did, he would become a little hopeful. If he became hopeful, then Yearning (personified here) which has always been with him, would feel abandoned and break out into sobs. Thus, he is so unfortunate that he is always yearning, his desire is never fulfilled and he never gets any encouragement from the beloved.

5
nahiN poochhtaa hai mujh ko koi phool is chaman meN
dil-e daaGh-daar1 hota to gale` ka haar hota    
1.wounded, bleeding
The bleeding heart is like a flower. No flower in the garden asks after the poor shaa’er/lover. No one cares for him. If he had had his bleeding heart, he could have worn it as a flower garland. But he does not even have that because he has given it away to the beloved.

6
vo mazaa diya taRap ne ke ye aarzu1 hai yaa-rab
mere donoN pahluoN2 meN dil-e be-qaraar3 hota    
1.wish, desire 2.sides (of the chest) 3.restless, yearning
The pain of yearning is greatly valued by the shaa’er/lover. He has felt such pleasure out of this pain that he prays that he had a heart on each side of his chest and double his pain.

7
dam1-e naz’a2 bhi jo vo but3 mujhe aa ke muNh dikhaata
to Khudaa ke muNh se itna na maiN sharmsaar4 hota    
1.at the moment of 2.death, last breath 3.idol, beloved 4.shamed
If at the time of my last breath, the beloved had come to my death bed, then I would not have been so shamed by the words of god. Apparently, after death, the shaa’er/lover was asked to give an accounting of his life. He could not show any accomplishment because the beloved did not show up even as that one courtesy which is considered obligatory. Therefore, his life was an utter failure.

8
na malak1 savaal karte na lahad2 fishaar3 deti
sar-e raah-e koo4-e qaatil5 jo mera mazaar6 hota    
1.angels 2.grave 3.pressure 4.lane 5.killer – used here to mean beloved 6.tomb
If my tomb had been at the head of the path into the lane of the beloved then my deliverance and judgement would have been so clear that angels would not have questioned me, I would not feel the confines of the grave, but would have been delivered straight to heaven.

9
jo nigaah1 ki thi zaalim2 to phir aaNkh kyuN churaaii
vahi tiir kyuN na maara jo jigar3 ke paar hota     
1.glance 2.oppressor i.e. beloved 3.seat of life ~ heart
You had once glanced at me (which made me fall in love with you), so why do you steal your eyes and look away now. Why not shoot that direct arrow (instead of a sidelong glance) to pierce my heart.

10
maiN zabaaN se tum ko sachcha kaho laakh baar kah duuN
ise kya karuN ke dil ko nahiN e’tebaar1 hota    
1.dependable, believable
If you insist, I will say, I will mouth the words and call you truthful a million times, but what can I do, my heart does not believe that.

11
meri Khaak bhi lahad1 meN na rahi amir2 baaqi
unheN marne hi ka ab tak nahiN e’tebaar3 hota  
1.grave 2.pen-name of shaa’er 3.belief
In conventional urdu verse, the beloved hears of the lover’s death and does not believe it. She thinks that he will show up to pester her. Now it has been so long after the shaa’er/lovers death that his body has completely disintegrated and even the remaining dust has disappeared (but that does not prevent the shaa’er from writing and the beloved is still young). Even after such a long time, the beloved still does not believe that he is dead.

amir ahmed amir minaaii (1829-1900) was contemporary of daaGh dehlavi and much like him received patronage in rampur and later in hyderabad, where he died and is buried.  Both he and daaGh composed Ghazals in the zamin of Ghalib.
1
mere bas1 meN ya2 to yaa-rab3 vo sitam-she’aar4 hota
ye na thaa to kaash5 dil par mujhe eKhtiyaar6 hota

1.control, influence 2.either 3.god, lord 4.of cruel nature, hard hearted 5.I wish 6.control, dominion

O, god, either the hard hearted beloved should have been under my influence, or if this could not have been then I wish I had control over my own heart.
2
pas1-e marg2 kaash3 yuN hi mujhe vasl4-e yaar5 hota
vo sar6-e mazaar7 hota maiN tah8-e mazaar7 hota

1.behind, after 2.death 3.I wish 4.union 5.beloved 6.in front of, at the head of 7.grave, tomb 8.under

The shaa’er/lover has pined for union all his life.  That never happened during his life and now it seems it did not even happen upon his death because he is wishing wistfully that after death, I wish that at least I could have achieved union with the beloved like this … that she had been in front of the grave and I under it.  The implication of this wistful wishing is that even that did not happen.
3
tera mai-kada1 salaamat2 tere Khum3 ki Khair4 saaqi
mera nashsha5 kyuN utarta mujhe kyuN Khumaar6 hota

1.tavern 2.long live 3.barrell, flask 4.well being, prosper 5.intoxication 6.hangover

May your tavern live long, O saaqi, and may your wine barrells always be full.  If this were to happen, why would I ever lose my intoxication (become sober) or get a hangover.  The implication is that if he keeps on drinking, he will never get a hangover, will always be intoxicated.
4
maiN huN na-muraad1 aisa ke bilak2 ke yaas3 roti
kahiN paa ke aasra4 kuchh jo umid-vaar5 hota

1.unfortunate 2.sobbing 3.yearning 4.shelter, support, encouragement 5.hopeful

The shaa’er/over never gets any encouragement from the beloved.  If he did, he would become a little hopeful.  If he became hopeful, then Yearning (personified here) which has always been with him, would feel abandoned and break out into sobs.  Thus, he is so unfortunate that he is always yearning, his desire is never fulfilled and he never gets any encouragement from the beloved.
5
nahiN poochhtaa hai mujh ko koi phool is chaman meN
dil-e daaGh-daar1 hota to gale` ka haar hota

1.wounded, bleeding

The bleeding heart is like a flower.  No flower in the garden asks after the poor shaa’er/lover.  No one cares for him.  If he had had his bleeding heart, he could have worn it as a flower garland.  But he does not even have that because he has given it away to the beloved.
6
vo mazaa diya taRap ne ke ye aarzu1 hai yaa-rab
mere donoN pahluoN2 meN dil-e be-qaraar3 hota

1.wish, desire 2.sides (of the chest) 3.restless, yearning

The pain of yearning is greatly valued by the shaa’er/lover.  He has felt such pleasure out of this pain that he prays that he had a heart on each side of his chest and double his pain.
7
dam1-e naz’a2 bhi jo vo but3 mujhe aa ke muNh dikhaata
to Khudaa ke muNh se itna na maiN sharmsaar4 hota

1.at the moment of 2.death, last breath 3.idol, beloved 4.shamed

If at the time of my last breath, the beloved had come to my death bed, then I would not have been so shamed by the words of god.  Apparently, after death, the shaa’er/lover was asked to give an accounting of his life.  He could not show any accomplishment because the beloved did not show up even as that one courtesy which is considered obligatory.  Therefore, his life was an utter failure.
8
na malak1 savaal karte na lahad2 fishaar3 deti
sar-e raah-e koo4-e qaatil5 jo mera mazaar6 hota

1.angels 2.grave 3.pressure 4.lane 5.killer – used here to mean beloved 6.tomb

If my tomb had been at the head of the path into the lane of the beloved then my deliverance and judgement would have been so clear that angels would not have questioned me, I would not feel the confines of the grave, but would have been delivered straight to heaven.
9
jo nigaah1 ki thi zaalim2 to phir aaNkh kyuN churaaii
vahi tiir kyuN na maara jo jigar3 ke paar hota

1.glance 2.oppressor i.e. beloved 3.seat of life ~ heart

You had once glanced at me (which made me fall in love with you), so why do you steal your eyes and look away now.  Why not shoot that direct arrow (instead of a sidelong glance) to pierce my heart.
10
maiN zabaaN se tum ko sachcha kaho laakh baar kah duuN
ise kya karuN ke dil ko nahiN e’tebaar1 hota

1.dependable, believable

If you insist, I will say, I will mouth the words and call you truthful a million times, but what can I do, my heart does not believe that.
11
meri Khaak bhi lahad1 meN na rahi amir2 baaqi
unheN marne hi ka ab tak nahiN e’tebaar3 hota

1.grave 2.pen-name of shaa’er 3.belief

In conventional urdu verse, the beloved hears of the lover’s death and does not believe it.  She thinks that he will show up to pester her.  Now it has been so long after the shaa’er/lovers death that his body has completely disintegrated and even the remaining dust has disappeared (but that does not prevent the shaa’er from writing and the beloved is still young).  Even after such a long time, the beloved still does not believe that he is dead.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *